Sooner or later you’ll probably have to fight someone.

This is especially true if you’re a guy aged 16 -80 and you leave the house from time to time.

There are probably over a million articles on the net that provide totally unpractical, bullshit advice on how to protect yourself. Sure if someone throws a punch at your reeeeeeealllllly slowly, then you could probably catch it, twist their arm in a variety of different directions and then eventually make their head fall off.  I thought it might be a good idea to ask around and share some bread and butter advice on how to win a fight really quickly and generally look like an all-round hero. That was until a friend pointed me in the direction of a video tape by former UFC champion and current nut job, Bas Rutten.

As a fan favourite with MMA fans around the world, Bas still commentates in the UFC and has had roles in cinematic classics such as Martial Law and Shadow Fury. He has also had cameo roles for Grand Theft Auto and won his last UFC comeback fight by kicking his opponent in the legs until the poor chap couldn’t walk anymore.

‘Bas Rutten’s Lethal Street Fighting Self Defence System’ has become a bit of a sensation on the net.

You can watch  part of it here:

[yframe url=’http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LVqCgBEei0o’]

The first two minutes or so are pretty practical but the rest of the video is a bit mental. Now don’t get me wrong this stuff would probably work in a fight, I just think blinding someone with the blood from your own artery may not be the most practical method of self defence. Combine these lessons in ultra violence with Bas’ high expense sound effects and you have a real video classic.

If you don’t have the time (or inclination) to watch Bas beat up a random guy for over an hour then some clever (or unemployed) guy made this auto tuned montage, enjoy.

[yframe url=’http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SNfYDKST95Y’]