People say weird stuff in the heat of the moment — here are the funniest replies from a Reddit thread asking users to share their weirdest:
Araama: I was once going down on my boyfriend and he wanted to say/moan something for… encouragement. He was starting with: good bitch, and remembered I don’t like being called a bitch… poor guy ended up saying “Good boy”.
Casanoval: I was giving a Turkish guy head and he kept saying (in a heavy accent no less), “continue! Continue!”
Molozzy: “You’re going to suck the soul out of my dick”
Alyseischeeky: “Wouldn’t it be fun if my clit could grow into a penis so I could fuck you?” No. No it would not. If I wanted a penis in my sex life I’d be sleeping with a guy.
IfMomKnew: During a choking session: “You’re so brave… brave little toaster…”
Alryeezi: “Your dick is the same size as my Dads”. I don’t think she meant it how it sounds, but it still means she was well aware of what her Dad was packing. Weird girl. Great fuck.
xxCLJ: “Just think, one day none of this will matter.” What my boyfriend said while I was on top.
Scrotum_nachos: I came on a girl’s stomach, and got up to get her a towel. She said, “Don’t worry about it, I like to let it dry there.”
Musicalpenis: Took off woman’s bra. She says “ohhh. You are good at that”. Decided to say “aye, practiced on my mum”. Seemed funny. No regrets. Note: did not actually practice on my mum.
Bustedknees: She did a countdown of my penis shrinking
Rollingtougher: Fuck me like Mowgli from the Jungle Book
RedRumOG: “your fingers feel like needles”. My stoned girlfriend while I was fingering her.
Paul_HeymanGuy: “You like that, you fucking retard?”
Sinjas: One time things were getting hot and heavy with my girlfriend, she whispers my name into my ear, and, for some reason, I don’t know why, I proceed to whisper my own name back into her ear. Extremely sensually”
Samdasoo: “Jesus. Every other girl I’ve been with would have come by now.”
Vanyel611: “That’s my stomach” — it was my first time and she was a bit overweight. I just stuck it where it felt best.
Cynod: Mid cowgirl she stopped, looked me in the eyes, whispered “faggot”, then proceeded to fuck my brains out. Still baffled me to this day
Luckynumber0: I really hate it when girls call me “dude” during sex. As in “fuck yeah, dude!” It’s happened on two different one night stands so far. Makes me feel like we’re playing Frisbee.
via (Reddit)
More Reddit: What’s The Weirdest Thing You’ve Seen At Someone’s House That They Thought Was Normal?