4) Disembowler
I’m a bit of an amateur twitcher myself, I make no apologies for that. I’m a fan of birds of the feathered sort and there’s nothing you can do to stop me. But there’s been a bit of a scary surprise for my kind this week. A six-foot tall, flightless rhea appears to have escaped from captivity and is enjoying the high life in the fields of Hertfordshire.
It all seems like pure excitement at first glance, but these things can pack a punch. They have 6 inch claws and can run at 40 mph. If they’re upset, they won’t try to talk to you about it or have a cry, they will end you. No discussion, they will simply disembowel you on the spot. So if you do see it, don’t try to ride it. It might be the last thing you attempt to mount.
The South American native has been on the run for a month now. To put your mind at ease if you’re in the area the RSPCA said this: “They look nice but will also go for your eyes with their beak”. Thanks guys.
☛ Next: Are Birds Really That Stupid?
