And now I’m in recovery. My hands are healing and I can use them again by this point. Dr.F said the only ones to worry about is my left pinky and right middle fingertip. I won’t find out until June. If I lose them I wanna make a sweet custom made prosthetic. The moral of the story is: 1) don’t go full retard. 2) try not to get blackout drunk. 3) but if you do, know how to get home. 4) find the pun in every situation.