A new study by OnBuy.com has produced a good news/bad news situation for the ages. According to their findings, your salary can be determined by your penis size… and it’s good news if you’ve got a micro dick.

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The study commissioned 1000 men to answer questions about work, salary, and penis size, to see if there is a correlation between size and salary.

They found that those with a penis of three inches in length, earned an average of £58,000 per year.

At the other end of the scale, those with a penis that measured seven and eight inches earned an average of £38,000 and £27,000 per year. Say what?!

Couple handy tables breaking it all down:

Well I was wondering why I got promoted this year… unfortunately, now I know!

In all seriousness, this does actually raise some interesting questions and hypothetical situations. If you could choose your own dick size directly correlated to salary, how far down the scale would you go? Say every inch is worth £15,000. So a 1-inch micro dick means you’re raking in £150,000 a year and 10-inch monstrosity means you’re basically living in poverty. What’s the best compromise?

In my view, making a ton of money compensates for having a small penis way more than the other way around, so I think I’d go for an average dick size of 5 – 6. I mean having an 8 incher would be great and all but how good would you really feel about it if you can’t afford a takeaway for the family?

Either way, this is a big Win for all the guys out there feeling a little bit insecure about their penis size. At least you’re bringing home more $$$ than all the other dudes who are better equipped to satisfy women sexually. At least according to this study. Could just be small dick propaganda for all I know. If you’re broke with a 3-incher, maybe mention it on your CV. Good luck!

For ‘Dinky One’ – the new dating app for men with small penises and women who prefer them, click HERE.