Confessions is back! Send your confessions in at [email protected] or DM us on Facebook, Twitter or Instagram. Everything we publish is 100% anonymous – just give an alias you’d like us to use.

Let’s go…

soul

For my friends 13th birthday, we all stayed in 1 room at a resort while his mum was a few doors down. The room had windows to the hallway. While watching Road Trip, a woman walked by in a bikini with 2 guys and we all stared. On her way back, she stopped, and flashed us. Best moment a kid could have! We still talk about it all these years later.

snooze

I woke up with a raging boner the other day and instead of pestering my sweet sleeping girlfriend I snuck to the bathroom and wacked one off to some porn on my phone. Is that weird?

ninjasupper

My parents have a photo of me coked up at a wedding in their living room. Anyone who goes over to their house sees it because it’s front and centre. They have no idea I’m super charged to my eye balls and would probably hate me if they knew.

[no name]

Sometimes, as a treat, I pull my pants and trousers down to my ankles and wee like a little boy. No idea why, but it makes me laugh for hours.

timur_999

My girlfriend is an alcoholic who embarrasses me every time we go out. One time I came out of a bar with my friends to find her laughing her head off while getting pretend shagged by her gay best mate over a barrier while everyone watched. Not sure how much longer I can put up with this…

plan z

Really thought I’d have my shit together by 33. Yet here I am…

sativagirl

I enjoy beeping and waving at random people on the street and watching them confusedly wave back

Press1

I used to call myself “the king” in primary school and bully other kids and make them my jesters or servants. Some I even deemed peasants. Then one day our teacher heard about it and ripped me in front of the whole class. Proper had a go at me and said loads of sarcastic and rhetorical things that my tiny brain couldn’t compute. I burts into tears in front of everyone and I remember the shock on my victims faces as they realised I wasn’t the badass 7 year old I made out to be. Things were never the same after that

Kingbozzer123

I was once so gurned I took a piss into a crowd of girls.

6feetunder

I never would have started smoking weed if I knew I’d be smoking it this long. Not only has it shaped my character and made me lazy, I’m now getting old enough to worry about the health implications too. I know everyone’s different. But if you’re still young, my advice is quit now.

[no name]

I once puked red wine everywhere in my boss’s downstairs loo after a bbq piss up at his house. I cleaned up as best I could but the wallpaper was destroyed. A girl at the same party who was drunker than me got the blame. I said it probably was her. She was blamed for years.

instaflop

I hate it when I’m watching porn on my phone and get a text/call from my mother. Happens far too often!

TMFACE

My ex dumped me a few months ago. We have a ton of mutual friends and I fucking hate that my friends still hang out with her despite making it clear I’d rather they didn’t. I don’t know if this makes me a pussy or if I have shit friends but I know for a fact if one of my boys told me to ignore a girl for them, I 100% would.

[no name]

Whenever I log into WiFi hotspots at airports or train stations or big shopping centres etc, I give my brother’s work email and click ‘yes’ for receiving promotional materials

Wesley king

I recently discovered the wonders of having my girlfriend tongue my bumhole and it’s been a complete game changer as far as my sex life goes. Trust me boys — you want to give it a try.

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[Send your confessions in at [email protected] or on our social media pages – don’t worry, we keep them 100% anonymous! Just send an alias if you want us to use one).

See you next Friday!