Pope Francis Became A Priest Because His Childhood Crush Rejected Him At Age 12

You can credit this old gal for Jorge Bergoglio becoming Pope Francis — when Bergoglio was just 12 he had a young “romance” with Amalia Damonta, writing a letter saying he would marry her and drawing a picture of the house they would live in. She says he vowed to become a priest if she refused his offer. However her dad read the letter and made her decision for her — no 12-year-old daughter of his would be talking to boys let alone marrying them, and he slapped her when she started to write a letter back.

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“I never saw him after that — my parents kept me away from him and did everything possible to separate us”, she said. As promised, Bergoglio went on to become a priest and then Pope.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qIKV3VTxZkQ

Come on Jorge, talk about an overreaction! Now not only will you never have sex, you also have to go to church for the rest of your life. Which is just awful.

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According to Jorge’s sister, he never even wanted to be Pope. He would “joke about it” and say “no, please no” when the idea was suggested to him. Which is no surprise because, if you ask us, after the initial conclave introduction (which is quite awesome) being Pope is nowhere near worth the hassle. You spend your whole life in church dealing with sex scandals and abortion freaks. Watch the video below of Jorge when he became Pope; he’s just standing on that balcony, staring out onto thousands of people thinking “Fuck. This.”

Or is this old minx just kicking herself/trying to take credit for his successes?