Not sure if you know the one about Pablo Escobar’s cocaine hippos, but the guy basically screwed up the whole ecosystem in his native Colombia by importing four of them to the ‘Hacienda Napoles’ compound where he lived near Medellin until his death in 1993. The hippos multiplied at an exponential rate, meaning that there are now 150 of the bxstards roaming around the country and contaminating water supplies with their toxic urine and poop. They don’t actually have anything to do with cocaine, but just have that nickname because of Escobar, obviously.

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Anyway, those people that are eager to get rid of the hippos (there are quite a few who are worried that there could be 14,000 of them by 2039 if they keep multiplying at this rate and others that think they’re cute and welcome the tourist attraction element of them) were pretty stoked this week after it emerged one of them had been involved in a car accident and sadly didn’t make it out of the other side. The incident took place near the former site of ‘Hacienda Napoles’, which is now a massive tourist attraction and zoo and presumably where this hippo escaped from.

Check out some of the quite graphic pictures from the scene of the crime below:

Geez that looks like carnage doesn’t it? Kinda surprised that the hippo ended up dead when the car looks like that to be honest. If you’re worried about the driver, thankfully he’s OK too.

As for the hippo problem in Colombia, I’m not really sure if this is going to help it all. They’re gonna wanna get that under control though because they’re not cute like in the movies at all and if there really do end up being 14,000 of them there could be some major problems, ‘Planet Of The Apes’ style.

Don’t believe me? Check out this hippo pretending to save a wild antelope before brutally destroying it. Told you they were bxstards.