I haven’t ever done a post on Jedward before here on Sick Chirpse, which is kind of surprising because they’re exactly the kind of idiots that we would love to make fun of. I guess I just kind of hoped they had disappeared from the public eye after X Factor, but I’m kind of surprised that they’re still making music and probably more so that people are actually still bothering to listen to it. But yeah, it was bought to my attention by a couple of people in my Facebook feed yesterday much to my shock – kinda like my surprise on Wednesday when so many people I knew seemed to truly care about the JLS split – and I couldn’t be happier that it did because it’s one of the funniest videos I’ve ever seen.

Anyway, what can you say about this video? It’s called What’s Your Number which is probably a really lame attempt at ripping off Carly Rae Jepsen’s Call Me Maybe (which is actually a banger) but it ends up sounding like a karaoke version of an Avril Lavigne song crossed with a One Direction song. Which might not actually be a bad thing if John and Edward had actually learned to sing by now, but it’s still autotuned as fuck and still sounds completely terrible. Of course it’s annoyingly catchy because it’s a dumb pop song, but in terms of actual production and singing it’s very very gross. Although having said it was catchy I can’t really remember how it goes so maybe it isn’t.

However, none of this compares to the music video. Aside fromt he fact it’s just not that good a song, the video really takes it to the next level. It’s basically Jedward walking around Brooklyn and Cony Island trying to look all cool and hip (obviously failing) and also completely and utterly failing to dance properly. I mean I don’t really ever watch music videos of boy bands dancing and I never really think ‘oh wow they’re great dancers, that’s awesome’ but watching Jedward try to dance in this video really does drive home that people who are actually in successful boy bands (or girl bands) are actually sick at dancing and have probably busted their asses to get that good, whereas Jedward just kinda bumble around like a couple of year 10’s the first time they get into a club wasted on Lambrini or White Lightning or whatever. Wait until the first chorus drops and you’ll see what I mean.

Also, I MIGHT be wrong about this but I’m fairly convinced that most of the shots in New York City are greenscreened and Jedward aren’t actually there in New York City!? This is pretty funny because it kind of exemplifies how terrible Jedward are that they couldn’t even afford to fly to New York City to shoot their video. In fact, watching it again I’m pretty much convinced they’re just using stock footage of Coney Island, purely from the way they’re standing in front of the rides – there’s no way that angle could be achieved from an actual shot right!? Actually it gets way worse as the video goes on and is completely obvious, I apologise to everyone for my inability to see this to begin with.

The fact that nobody on the streets in the New York street scenes even seems to acknowledge that two bent Irish twins are dancing around like dickheads is perhaps the biggest giveaway.  Or maybe it’s the fact when they’re on the subway with the breakdancers that one of them almost hits one of the twins (I don’t know which one, gimme a break) a couple of times and only misses by about a centimetre and the fact that there is no reaction from either of them is another fairly obvious error. I mean come on guys at least TRY to make it look like Jedward could hang with some cool breakdancers in Brooklyn by at least TRYING to make them look like they’re reacting to each other in the video!?

But yeah, just imagine when they were greenscreening this and Jedward had to sit on a chair in a really shit studio (no way it was good) pretending to look at some guy breakdancing and reacting. Or not reacting as the case may be. That’s a career low right there for anyone, although perhaps not for Jedward. I mean when Jedward is your career is there such a thing as a career low, I mean you’re already Jedward FFS, is there any possible way you could fall down even further? Still, I think their target audience (babies and retards) would probably be fooled by the photoshop job. Good job whoever did that, seriously.

I don’t know what is more embarrassing, the fact that it’s greenscreened or that they’re so shit at dancing or that we’re actually doing a post about it. Actually, the fact that they even released this video is probably the most embarrassing. Check it out below:

☛ More Terrible Music Videos: 

X Factor Loser Frankie Cocozza Releases Awful New Single She’s Got A Motorcycle 

2012’s Rebecca Black – Double Take With Hot Girl Problems 

Tonje Langetaig – I Don’t Wanna Be A Crappy Housewife  

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