Most people try to have some kind of respect for the tradition and history of the Royal Family, and that wasn’t too difficult when Queen Elizabeth was around. King Charles III though? He doesn’t exactly come across as a wise and lovable king, and probably less so once you read about his daily list of demands.
In 2015, Amazon released a documentary called ‘Serving The Royals’ that detailed the inner workings of the staff who tended to King Charles’ every command. He was nicknamed the “pampered prince” by his staff at Clarence House, where he lived with his wife Camilla from 2003 until he recently took the throne.
Paul Burrell, who served as a butler to Queen Elizabeth and Princess Diana, shared that King Charles had “everything done for him.”
“His pyjamas are pressed every morning, his shoelaces are pressed flat with an iron, the bath plug has to be in a certain position, and the water temperature has to be just tepid, in a bath tub filled only half full.”
The King “has his valets squeeze one inch of toothpaste onto his toothbrush every morning.” After getting ready, Charles’ strict morning routine is continued with his breakfast. According to chef Graham Newbould, a former member of the royal staff:
“Prince Charles has a healthier option. He’d have homemade bread, a bowl of fresh fruit, fresh fruit juices.
He has six different types of honey, some special mueslis, his dried fruit and anything that’s a bit special that he is a bit fussy about.”
He also insists his cheese and biscuits be warmed at a certain temperature at the end of meals and makes his staff keep a warming tray nearby.
King Charles apparently sends a van of his possessions to his friends’ country houses ahead of his arrival to unload his “bed, furniture and even pictures,” Tina Brown reported in ‘The Palace Papers.’ He reportedly even brings his own toilet seat and Kleenex Velvet toilet paper wherever he goes.
What the royal f***? Look, I’m sure I’d be coming up with some weird list of demands if I were King too, but having staff iron my shoelaces? I’m looking down at my creased shoelaces right now and feeling like an absolute bum. Squeezing toothpaste onto my own toothbrush instead of getting someone else to do it for me? Having one kind of honey at the breakfast table instead of six? Buying bread from Tesco instead of having it homemade every morning? I guess these are the sorts of things that separates the Royals from the rest of us peasants.
The best part though is that King Charles takes his own toilet seat everywhere he goes so that his royal butt cheeks don’t have to touch a stranger’s toilet when he’s taking a dump at their house. He even takes his own toilet paper because there’s no way he’s taking a gamble on whatever budget toilet paper other people are using in their home. The more I think about it, you almost have to respect how casually Charles wields his unearned power in this way. The guy just comes up with whatever list of demands he wants and his royal staff have no choice but to obey.
At least he’s making the most of it, and it’s not like he’s asking for any Bill Clinton-style favours from his staff (that we know about anyway). Now if he could only get one of his servants to stop his damn pen from leaking…
