In order to stay relevant, many awful celebrities desperately grasp at certain bandwagons or trending topics in an exhausting effort to get the media to notice them. This happens with most things whether it be a simple #ThrowbackThursday or telling us their opinion on the Harambe killing. Yesterday was the nationwide A-level results day and while many achieved the grades they needed to get into their chosen University or do whatever they want in life, some failures didn’t have it so lucky.
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While your own A-level results day is a once in a lifetime milestone, we all have to witness its annual limelight in the media. There’s no escape. Celebrities tend to use this as an opportunity to give the public an unwanted insight into their own academic achievements, with many bragging that they became successful despite their bad grades.
https://twitter.com/Truman_Black/status/766209332094521344
And while “we started from the bottom now we’re here” may be true for some famous faces, many still come from pretty privileged backgrounds and probably wouldn’t be where they are without this. Prized prick Matt Healy, frontman of the world’s most embarrassing band, The 1975, took to Twitter yesterday to make light of the fact he barely scraped by in school and is now king of the emos. Perhaps if his parents weren’t the wealthy Denise Welch and Tim Healy, he wouldn’t be so lucky. “Artist”, indeed.
If there was a big shiny golden plaque for the absolute worst of the worst celebrity A-level results day tweet every year, former ‘Top Gear’ presenter Jeremy Clarkson would win every single time hands down. Every year without fail, this ageing gobshite reminds us all that he did shit at school. When you’ve fallen short of your desired marks, the last thing you want to think about is Clarkson’s smug grin as he sails around the sunny Bahamas or wherever, wiping up food remnants from his protruding beer gut using a crisp £20 note.
Surely this is sending out the wrong message to kids because whilst some may catch a break, most will need to come up with some sort of plan B to ensure a decent future. You may have been able to buy a house in the olden days with a few shiny copper coins and get a job but the world isn’t like that anymore. Honestly though, he does this. Every. Single. Year.
2016
If your A level results are disappointing, don't worry. I got a C and two Us, and I'm currently on a superyacht in the Med.
— Jeremy Clarkson (@JeremyClarkson) August 18, 2016
2015
If your A level results aren't great, be cheered by the fact that I got a C and two Us. And I'm currently sitting in a villa in St Tropez.
— Jeremy Clarkson (@JeremyClarkson) August 13, 2015
2014
If your A level results aren't joyous take comfort from the fact I got a C and two Us. And I have a Mercedes Benz.
— Jeremy Clarkson (@JeremyClarkson) August 14, 2014
For fuck’s sake, we got your message the first time around. Stop rubbing your Mercedes in our chronically broke faces. Why does Snoop Dogg support this pompous asshole?