Take Adderall in 50 states

Only legal in America, their doctors seem to give out prescriptions to anyone who asks, even though it’s previously been found to have links to heart attacks and if you take it for too long you can get amphetamine psychosis. Heavy.

Own a flamethrower in 40 states

Hey can I smoke this pretty harmless drug that does very little evil in the world? No way! Hey can I own this instrument that throws fire nearly 300 feet across the room and will reduce a human being to a smoking cinder? Sure, go ahead!

And if you were wondering how insanely terrifying they look in practice…

[yframe url=’http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=thaP_5d8ZpQ’]

Own a taser in 43 states

Again: you can’t marry the person you love if they’re the same gender as you but go ahead and electrocute them if they piss you off.

Or, you know, just for fun:

[yframe url=’http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GuZ1-us8edY’]

America — letting the weirdo’s rein free since 1776…