7) Dogs
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Man’s best friend my arse. They’re vicious little bleeders. If you’re confronted by a rabid snapper don’t egg it on, don’t move about, don’t flail your arms, don’t look at in the eyes, and for the love of god don’t smile. You might think you have a lovely calming smile, but all the dog sees is teeth. And teeth mean fights.
Despite what every molecule in your body will be saying – don’t run. Dogs love chasing things, and you can pretty much guarantee that they’re faster than you. If the fight is inevitable try to use your weight to pin the dog down and if that fails cover your vital organs and get foetal.
