People always wanna get more tips on how they can be better at dating, but I don’t think this extends to being brutally trolled with a bunch of hints three months after your first date.

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This is the unfortunate situation that the woman you can see above found herself in following an awful first date with a guy. 24 year old Kimberley Latham-Hawkesford matched the unknown dude on Tinder in Morecambe a while ago and the pair went for a coffee, only to find that they really enjoyed each other’s company and decided to continue the date by heading for food at a pub in the Lake District.

However, the date suddenly went south during the meal after the guy told Kimberly that she should get plastic surgery and where she should go shopping before the pair met again. The nail in the coffin was when Kimberley offered to pay and the dude went mental, even going as far to show her his bank balance on his phone. Ooof.

She thought that this was probably the last that she would ever hear from the guy, but instead three months later she received the following message from him:

Hello Kimberley, I know we went on a date quite a while ago now but I’d like to explain why I haven’t messaged you.

I feel like you could have made the date much better, here’s a few reasons why. I apologise if I offend you.

If you lost some weight you would look incredible. Maybe a stone or so.

You are very pale. I know you aren’t a fan of the sun but a bit of fake tan wouldn’t hurt.

You have quite big boobs so you should show off your cleavage more.

I think you need to wear clothes that suit your figure and maybe update your style slightly. Just so I’m not embarrassed to be seen with you.

You need to dye your hair a normal colour and add extensions. Longer hair is much more attractive.

You need to look more natural, stop wearing make up. Just make yourself look decent but don’t overkill it.

Your lips have gone down so you should think of getting more filler. I know you said you regretted it but filler would make you sexier.

You need so much more confidence, confidence is sexy!

The fact you take things slow makes you look like a prude. I didn’t get a kiss which messed with my ego. Be more sensitive to others’ feelings.

When we got food, I know you got a salad but having full fat coke is more calories you don’t need.

You need to keep your past to a minimum. I don’t care about it and what you went through.

Get a sense of humour, you didn’t laugh at a single one of my jokes.

You just seemed a bit stuck up. Sort your personality out.

You made me feel shit when you offered to pay. It’s like you thought I didn’t have enough money after telling you how much is in my account.

You didn’t compliment me once.

If you take these on board I might consider another date. I will give you a month and get back in touch to see if this made a difference. Good day to you Kimberly.

Wow. Where to begin with this eh? This guy literally thinks he’s so damn good that Kimberley will perform all of these tasks – most of which don’t make sense like ‘sort your personality out’ – on the off chance that he might see her again. Wouldn’t she be so lucky?

Honestly guys doing stuff like that really makes you despair for the whole human race, but somehow it seems more common than you might expect. Can’t believe that people actually send messages like that thinking that women might tactually tick all those boxes in the hopes of one little date. Honestly.

Also, if she isn’t laughing at your jokes it’s probably because they’re not funny, not because she doesn’t have a sense of humour. Asshole.

For more of the same, check out these women giving some tips about getting laid on the first date. Advice you can probably actually trust this time.