We’ve already had to deal with the health overhaul of so many of our favourite shitty food products, but I think this most recent feat by Greggs is just a step too far.

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They’ve decided to come over all health conscious and introduce a ‘health pasty’. The two new pasties in the range come with a choice of chicken katsu or Bombay potato filling, with a crunchy sourdough-based shortcrust pastry and a crumb topping. What the hell? Whatever happened to the classic sausage and baked bean melt?

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Both new pasties have less than 300 calories and contain up to two thirds less fat than the classic steak bake. They will join the franchises’ ‘Balanced Choice’ range, which also comprises fruit pots, yoghurt and granola.

Roger Whiteside, the group’s chief executive officer, said:

Greggs is well-loved for its traditional pasties and sausage rolls, but we recognise that our customers are increasingly looking for lower calorie and lower fat options.

All the research says Greggs is a brand which appeals right across the whole spectrum of consumers. We want them to come more frequently.

Right, I totally get that it’s important to try to stay healthy and eat well. But I think establishments like Greggs, McDonald’s and Burger King should all just face up to the fact that they are saved for treat day. No one goes in search for a healthy, balanced meal in Greggs – it’s just not the time or the place. We go there for a dirty pasty or a sweaty sausage roll and at certain times, that is great. Stop running from who you are Greggs.

I think they should just sack off this healthy range and invest more time into the Greggs pasty pizza instead.