With the end times upon us, nobody really cares about money any more and the currency of the land is toilet paper with packets even at your local supermarket going for something ridiculous like £12 as people stockpile them to make sure they will be able to wipe their asses during any potential quarantine.

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Obviously, people are going to use this sudden desire for toilet paper to make money and this has been exemplified by DJ Lee Marshall, who is bragging that he set up a shop selling toilet paper in a local lay-by in Whitstable, Kent and sold 600 cases of 45 rolls for £15 a pack in two hours. Not really sure that that’s that cool considering there’s a national (perhaps global?) shortage of the stuff right now, but Lee’s justifying it by the fact that all his upcoming gigs have been cancelled and he has no source of income for whoever knows how long.

Here’s what he had to say:

A supplier messaged us and said they’ve got loads of toilet roll and can’t sell them because hotels aren’t buying at the moment. They’re just sitting in a warehouse.

I looked in the supermarket and they were roughly the same price as an Andrex toilet paper anyway – so we’ve sort of made £3-per-pack on them.

We kept some back for delivering at night – as we’ve had a lot of people messaging that they can’t reach us. My mate Brett was out until 11.30pm the day before.

The last drop-off I did last night, the old lady was scared and left her money by the door. We’ve done so many home deliveries and haven’t charged extra for them.’

O’m a DJ and I’ve had so many gigs cancelled. I’ve got bills to pay and trying to keep my head above water. I’ve always been a bit of a businessman and thought you can’t always make memories, but you can always make money.

All four of us involved have lost our jobs – we had this week and have bills to pay like anyone else.

Just putting this out there as there seems to be a lot of statements going around that we profited heavily from the vulnerable when it’s not like that at all.

Actually had a horrible week despite keeping a smile and powering through – hearing of so many others losing their jobs and my gigs getting cancelled.

Most of us reading this have our health, a roof over are head and a half comfy bed. I’ve never been one to show off materialistic things – I’m all about making the memories, travelling to places etc it’s gonna be tough times for all ahead. Always appreciate the simple things in life.

I’m usually happy all the time, I’m messing around with friends, making random vidz – just saying this cause now is the time to be very careful with the money we do have in times of uncertainty. Peace out much.

I mean like I said it is a bit of a difficult one because the guy seems to have lost his livelihood for the foreseeable future, but I guess I would probably be more sympathetic to him not being a twat if he wasn’t bragging about making so much money on the internet and doing a fucking photoshoot with his bloody toilet rolls. Also seems like he made way more money than what he’s saying if he bought the bog roll off a wholesaler to begin with as they’re not going to be charging what the supermarkets are surely?

Whole argument doesn’t really make much sense and Lee probably would have earned more money from donations if they had all just teamed up and delivered the toilet roll for free and live-streamed it. I get that that’s a bit of a risky strategy and he may not have wanted to do that though, but even so he comes across like a bit of a knob making so much money out of a time of crisis. Don’t think I’m going to be able to get over that whatever his intentions were at the start.

For more of the same, check out this woman who bought 18 rolls only for her kid to throw them all in the bath. Lol.