Everton — Liverpool fans aside, how can you not like Everton? They have one of the league’s best managers, a chairman who has undying love for the club and a team that plays for each other. In an industry where money means success, Everton continue to wage a one-team war against this convention. They are badly in need of investment and I hope they get bought out by a super-rich oil tycoon very soon.

Fulham — I love Fulham because they have one of the most eccentric owners in football; Mohammed Al Fayed. It takes a brave man to erect a statue of Michael Jackson outside a football stadium. They have a good coach in place and star man Clint Dempsey is an absolute beast.

Liverpool — They may have had their title as England’s most successful league team taken away from them but they are still England’s most successful team in European competition. I’m sure that when they finally get back into a position to add to that tally they’ll probably almost do it. Liverpool is good.

Manchester City — Probably the toughest for me. One third of world football’s true dream teams along with Real Madrid and Barcelona. (We’re going on my definition of dream team i.e. a team where the ratio of world class players to the rest of the rabble is more in favour of the world class) The richest team in the world, and as the saying goes, money makes the world go round. That’s right isn’t it? Man City is goo….nope can’t do it.

Manchester United — Where to start? A record 19 league titles. Constantly criticised for not playing the free-flowing football they’re famous for yet are always challenging for the title. One of the best team-spirits in the league and a never-say-die attitude. The best, most successful manager this country has ever seen. Trophy after trophy. I fvcking hate them.