Back in high school, kids would do literally anything to be popular so I’m kinda glad we never had to do anything like vote for a homecoming queen over here because I can imagine it being seriously traumatic for the people that lose. High school kids can be so mean.

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I’ve seen TV shows where kids hand out bribes in order to secure the votes of their classmates for these positions, but I’ve never seen them do anything as cool as an unnamed 17 year old from Hartford High School in Michigan who decided to offer her peers hash brownies in exchange for their compliance. She even put some of the brownies in the football team’s homecoming week goodie bags. Classic tactic – get the cool kids on side and the others will come running.

The local police force managed to recover three of the twelve brownies that were apparently baked, warning that the other nine may have been consumed. Just check and see how many of the football team can actually throw or catch a ball without pissing themselves at the next practice and you should have your answer guys.

Anyway, whilst me and you are probably having a good chuckle at this, both the school and the local police are taking the situation seriously. Officer Michael Prince said the following:

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The school [is] taking this very seriously.

They are doing their own investigation, and they’re just starting to turn over some of the statements from the students possibly involved or witnesses.

Very seriously. Conveniently though, the girl in question is currently ‘out of state’ with her mother and unavailable to be questioned. You know, just on a quick out of state family trip during school time – perfectly normal.

The worst thing about all this though is that the girl is unnamed. Can you imagine how much props and respect you would get for the rest of your life if a quick Google came up with the information. I would want her to be my friend ASAP if that wasn’t completely creepy. Just saying – maybe turn yourself in and admit it. It might work out better in the long run.

For more of the same, check out these guys who were arrested for selling weed brownies at a school bake sale. Silly.