A Buddhist monk from East Yorkshire has gone to jail after he slashed a shit tonne of tyres because he killed an insect.

Back in September Julian Glew stepped on a bug, accidently I might add. Nonetheless, the devastating act left him in such a state of frustration that it compelled him to go and mess up £20,000 worth of tyres. Weird way to vent, usually people just go and punch a wall or something. Also, I thought Buddhist monks were meant to be calm and peaceful? That bug must have really meant something to him.

Obviously you can’t just go around damaging people’s cars unnoticed — Julian was taken to court and pleaded guilty to three counts of criminal damage. In a shock twist he then ran away for three months. Probably back to his tent in the woods where he had been living for the last 20 years.

Finally he was tracked down and now has to spend 11 weeks in jail. The District Judge Fred Rutherford said about the case:

When interviewed by police he said he was angry and wanted to take his frustration out on society without hurting people.

He lives in the woods and is detached from society. He has lived that existence for 20 years and previously lived in a Buddhist monastery.

Speaking about the incident, Inspector Joanne York of Humberside Police said that the tyre-slashing spree spanned over two nights. That’s got to be a shocker for any victims who were witness to it — trying to enjoy a chill evening after work and seeing some skinny, feral monk going mental on your car.

It’s absolutely bizarre – I mean his actions were completely contradictory. As a monk, yes you aren’t supposed to harm a living creature but I’m sure that Buddha or Karma or whatever would forgive you if it were a mistake. And going and ruining people’s property and most likely their day is not a good way to repent.

Chill out man. If you want to learn how to be like a real monk and not this angry guy, check out our guide to how mindfulness will change your life.