The head of the British army has warned that Brits face being called up to fight in the event of a war with Russia because the military is “too small” and will require a “citizen army” to help out.

General Sir Patrick Sanders wants British men and women to be prepared to fight if Nato goes to war with Russia, who have gained the upper hand in the invasion of Ukraine. This comes after a warning by a senior Nato official that the West faces all-out war with Russia within 20 years.

Which makes you wonder how our government and military have managed to sh1t the bed so spectacularly when it comes to preparing for this sort of conflict? Don’t we spend billions on this sort of thing to make sure we’re ready for war at any moment?

I don’t know if this would be a voluntary thing or if they’re preparing us for full-on conscription where you’d have no choice but to fight in the war when called up, but I’m pretty sure at this point that war with Russia would last for only a couple hours before your local Sainsbury’s is turned into a radioactive wasteland.

Speaking at a conference in Twickenham, south-west London, General Sanders said that within three years Britain should possess a larger army of 120,000, including regular soldiers, reserves and a “strategic reserve” group – which is apparently retired troops who have been recalled.

“Our friends in Eastern and Northern Europe, who feel the proximity of the Russian threat more acutely, are already acting prudently, laying the foundations for national mobilisation.”

On the need for civilians to be involved:

“We need an Army designed to expand rapidly to enable the first echelon, resource the second echelon, and train and equip the citizen army that must follow. As the Chairman of the NATO Military Committee warned just last week, and as the Swedish government has done, preparing Sweden for entry to NATO, taking preparatory steps to enable placing our societies on a war footing when needed are now not merely desirable, but essential.”

Asked about General Sanders’ remarks, Rishi Sunak’s official spokesman, said “hypothetical scenarios” about potential future conflicts were “not helpful”. Let’s hope it remains a hypothetical for as long as possible.

Meanwhile, the Israeli PM’s son, Yair Netanyahu, was exempt from his dad’s military draft as he vacationed in Miami last October. Alright for some.