44-year-old Michael Sylvester says he has been stopped an incredible 40 times by river police in the last month while trying to relax in his boat on the Thames.

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“But why?” I hear you ask. Well, you know how UK police tend to pull over black people significantly more often than they do white? (Don’t try to deny it – the stats don’t lie). Turns out this prejudice also occurs on water too.

Sylvester – a Londoner – says that the police hassle him all the time because they assume he’s a terror threat. How are the police allowed to do that, it’s madness. The dad-of-two says he is approached sometimes as often as six times in a day, even when he’s on it with his friends and family. What a joke. He said:

They’re profiling me because they think I fit the description of a terrorist. It’s pure racism.

They assume I’m a terrorist but I’m not even Muslim. Guaranteed if I was white I would’t get hassled like this. I’m the only black guy out on the river with a boat.

I speak with white people who moor at the same marina and they tell me they’ve never been stopped and that it’s a ‘black thing’.

I love the boat, you can’t get fun like it but I’m thinking of selling it to a mate because every time I take it out there’s drama.

Firstly, it’s fucking dumb that these wanky river police are so bored that they’re on the look out for terrorists. How many terrorist attacks have there been in London in the last decade? Hardly any when you compare it to other dangerous crimes in the city. They should be focusing their efforts on more pressing matters.

Also, poor Sylvester. I can’t believe he’s actually thinking of giving up his favourite pastime because he gets hassled by racist policemen so often. It just ain’t right.

Look at them bastards in their dumb policeman boat. Leave Sylvester alone already and get on with your job. Bunch of cunts.

For more London policemen being wankers, here’s one smashing through someone’s windscreen for no reason whatsoever.