Everyone has their own fond memories of childhood characters, whether it be a morbid fascination with Mr Blobby or a disturbing obsession with My Little Pony. Cartoons genuinely loved during adolescence tend to stay with us our entire lives, you’ll be forever remembering the theme tune all the way to your death bed. But what happens to our favourite figures when we grow out of them?
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The iconic Mr Men children’s book series began in 1971, written by British author Richard Hargreaves an compromised of 49 original illustrations whose personalities revolved around the adjective in their suname. An accompanying Little Miss series launched a decade later in 1981, upping the list to 91 characters overall.
The books have become one of the most notable British literary children’s series of all time, but as we grow up and away from our old friends, what did they get up to? Here’s where I imagine they’d be at today if they lived amongst us in the real world.
Mr Nosey
Stardom hit Mr Nosey hard and he’s wound up addicted to sniff. He uses his book royalties on acquiring enough gak to get him through the day. Surprisingly his horrifically oversized septum is still in tact.
Mr Bump
Unfortunately for Mr Clumsy, pacing around outside at dusk without a torch whilst attempting to catch Pokémon lead to his grisly demise. I’m not even sure how this clumsy sod managed to survive so long in the first place.
Little Miss Naughty
After fading out of the limelight, Little Miss Naughty sought pastures new and embraced a new career supplying the hottest parties with a decent drug supply. Clearly it didn’t end so well as now she’s locked behind bars, where apparently she causes total mayhem. If you’re wondering about the source of Mr Nosey’s addiction, then look no further.
Mr Tickle
The compulsion to tickle everyone and everything has gotten the better of Mr Tickle, who now has restraining orders against most the local children and a couple of adults too.
Mr Forgetful
Thanks to the rise of the smartphone, Mr Forgetful is able to organise his life more efficiently than ever before. Not only can he keep his appointments written down in his calendar, but keeping notes and setting alarms have been a real life saver. He tried to keep on top of everything once before with a Filofax in the 80s but he managed to lose all ten of them.
Little Miss Chatterbox
If there’s one thing that Little Miss Chatterbox is good at, it’s talking. Her great communication skills are well served in her up and coming PR firm where she works as the Chief Director. Solange came in last week.
Mr Fussy
Mr Fussy’s pedantic ways may have lost him his past friendships with the Mr Men and Little Miss gang but he has landed a pretty sweet role as a world renowned food critic. Restaurants from all over are dying to get him to visit and hear his honest opinions.
Mr Busy
If he’s not working studiously in his office, Mr Busy is probably rushing about the capital at his job at the law firm. His assistant replies to all his texts and emails because frankly, he doesn’t have time.
Mr Uppity
When he’s not campaigning for the return of fox hunting, he’s privatising our NHS. Mr Uppity doesn’t understand the struggles of the modern Mr Man and is now a leading MP in the Conservative party.
Little Miss Neat
If you’re after bathroom surfaces shinier than diamonds and counters that are clean enough to eat off, you should probably look up Little Miss Neat on Gumtree. Her references are as immaculate as your home could be.
Mr Snow
Whenever you hear the ice cream van chimes across your neighbourhood, be sure to take a look out your window as you may see Mr Snow happily riding around in his vehicle of sweet treats. This warm-hearted frosty man apparently gives free cones out on his birthday, whenever that is.
Mr Clever
Due to his expanse of useless knowledge, not only did Mr Clever become the fastest ever contestant to win the jackpot on ‘Who Wants To Be A Millionaire’ but he also became the champion of ‘Countdown’ too. Word on the street is that he’s currently in talks with producers creating his own ITV game show.
Little Miss Splendid
This agreeable lady now owns her own kitschy homewear store down in Chelsea. Definitely worth checking out if you’re into shabby chic or pointless decorative sticks in overpriced vases.
If you’re after more nostalgia with a gloomy twist on reality, check out these grim illustrations of childhood cartoons with drug addictions. We didn’t ever ask for this but here we are.
