Top 5 Most Annoying People On The London Underground

If it wasn’t for public transport a lot of us would be screwed. Especially living in London a lot of the time it’s the most convenient means of getting anywhere. That doesn’t make it any else infuriating though, when you encounter one of the following thoughtless passenger on your commute.

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5. People Who Don’t Let The Passengers Off The Train First

Probably one of the easiest things to figure out on the underground is that you’re supposed to let people off the train before you get on it. Yet there are still idiots who don’t get this despite the fact that it’s common sense/announced at pretty much every stop. Usually the culprit is some little old lady holding a protective barrier of shopping bags all around her, but it could literally be anyone.

It shouldn’t have had to come to this but I say everyone getting off trains from now on link arms at the doors and just charge and make sure this kind of thing stops happening.

4. People On The Cusp Of Being Eligible For You To Give Up Your Seat To Them

Is that woman pregnant or fat (not the one in the photo, she’s clearly pregnant and everyone sitting down is a twat)? Is that guy 70 or 53? Do I offer my seat or will I end up hurting someone’s feelings? There’s no doubt about it – people on the cusp of being eligible for you to give up your seat to them are a complete mind-f*ck. Either allow me to do the decent thing and offer you my seat or give me some eye contact that says “I’m fine, thanks” while I’m sitting here having a mental crisis.

3. People Listening To Loud Music

If I hear ‘No Flex Zone’ or some other mindless noise blaring out of some little shithead’s earphones one more time I’m going to turn into Edward Norton from Fight Club and just start beating the crap out of myself in the middle of the carriage. Anything to just make it stop. Idiots don’t even know the damage they’re doing to their eardrums. Enjoy it while it lasts, morons.

2. Parents With Young Children

Hey little fella, I’m pretty sure we’ve never met before, so why are you staring at me? I don’t know you. Oh crap, now you’re coming up to me and everyone’s watching and I’ve got to act like I don’t want to punch you in the face (which I’m not above doing if you get any closer). Really though, it’s annoying when people don’t control their kids on the tube and instead act like they don’t notice their kid’s being irritating.

And most annoying of all…

1. People Who Eat On The Tube

Ah yes, this one has been a hot topic as of late. It’s not just women eating on tubes though, it’s everyone who lacks any sort of decency and tact. Subway sandwiches, KFC buckets, Chinese food, Indian food, flipping three course meals. People eating crisps who lick their fingers and then wipe their hands on their jeans. Gross – sort it out.