Rhabdomyolysis
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Yup, CrossFit increases your risk of rhabdomyolysis. What? You don’t know what rhabdomyolysis is? OK, I’ll tell you, and I defo didn’t summarise this from the first paragraph of Wikipedia’s explanation:
Rhabdomyolysis is a condition where muscles breaks down rapidly. These ruptured muscle cells release all sorts of shit into your veins; some of this unwelcome shit, like myoglobin, is harmful to the kidneys. Symptoms can include muscle pains, vomiting and confusion, and at the worst end of the spectrum: kidney failure.
In 2005 Makimba Mimms successfully sued CrossFit for $300,000 after he suffered from a case of Rhabdomyolysis. CrossFit are taking the rhabdo seriously though and released these “Uncle Rhabdo” T-shirts to raise awareness…
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Jesus Christ. I’m pretty sure they don’t give a shit about anyone getting hurt do they? Yeah, you have to take your own risks in life, but if someone is getting massively fat off the cash people pay them to get fit, they should at least have some sense of human welfare.
