Hospital food hardly has the best reputation going out there, but I think you would probably agree with me being surprised to find out that a lot of hospitals were actually serving mouldy, out of date food that is going to increase their patients’ risk of infection.

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A new investigation has found that 400 hospitals, care homes and hospices in the country are ranked as needing improvement and are characterised by unclean worktops, food trolleys and sinks. They also regularly give their patients food poisoning as a result of giving them shitty food. Nice.

At the moment, eight of the assessed facilities require urgent improvement, scoring a zero on the rating system. Fortunately none of these are hospitals, but a couple of hospitals do creep into the one star rating: ‘major improvement necessary’. This includes the private Priory Hospital in Altrincham, Cheshire as well as 184 non hospital care facilities.

205 were given the ranking of two which meant ‘improvement necessary’. One of these was the Glenfield Hospital in Leicester, of which the report said the following (as reported by Metro):

Problems were found in its kitchens serving patients, those in the Bennion Centre for the elderly, the Bradgate mental health unit and at the L’Eat restaurants for patients and visitors.

An inspection of patient catering kitchens in August found sliced chicken two days past its use-by date. Inspectors found staff had created their own date labels for when they thought food should be used, creating a high risk for patients who might develop food poisoning.

There were leaking sinks, inadequate knowledge among staff about how to handle food safely, and mouldy areas, including the salad preparation room.

There was a lot of water in the corridors and store rooms caused by condensation on walls and ceilings which was dripping and pooling on the floor.

There was a lot of mould and mouldy sealant caused by the damp conditions.

Flies were also found in the washing-up area, salad was being washed in a sink in direct contact with the plug and bags of salad had passed their use-by date but were being used for sandwiches and salads.

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Jesus. If that was what was going on in a two star facility I don’t even want to know what was going on in a zero star one. These guys are supposed to be helping us get better, not trying to kill us. I guess the NHS could really do with that extra £350million a week right about now huh guys if you’re listening?

In the meantime (forever) try not to get sick and decide which you think is worse, hospital food or these pictures of disgusting airline dinners. Really hard choice, trust me.